Here Comes the Bride

I know of several weddings happening in this month of June. While the groom and his beloved are excited and eager, I know the parents are managing mixed emotions. The wedding, while a joyous occasion, can still represent a loss for all concerned.

Many in the wedding party are giving up pieces of themselves for the greater good and the promise of an even stronger future that they can create together. The positive among us consider this event a win rather than a loss (think of the father's toast that includes "I'm not losing a daughter, I am gaining a son") and that's good.

But it still doesn't hurt to acknowledge the changes as you go through them. For example, a bride's conversation with her best single friends to assure them their bond is unbreakable can help to assure a comfortable celebration.

A late night chat with her mom can help the bride learn that there will always be a home for her in her old room, should the need arise. And the groom can calm his nerves by talking to a father or father figure, gaining reassurance that his step forward as a husband will be a successful one.

The wedding itself often signals a rite of passage to the guests. These two love birds have spread their wings and gone and grown up on us. They're ready to greet the world together. While a lovely moment, it can also trigger your own losses: the husband now deceased or simply the loss of childhood still longed for today.

So when you're offering your champagne toast at a wedding reception this summer, remember the win-win of the big day. Focus on the joy rather than any personal regrets and enjoy the celebration.

Cheers!